


None of Your Business

by YellowBananaOwl



Category: Cabin Pressure
Genre: M/M, letscreatecabinpressure
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-30
Updated: 2013-09-30
Packaged: 2017-12-28 01:29:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/986036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YellowBananaOwl/pseuds/YellowBananaOwl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The MJN crew gets together after a day off, and Douglas is very interested in hearing about the other crew members' day. But not everyone is willing to share ... at first. Written for the letscreatecabinpressure challenge on tumblr.</p>
            </blockquote>





	None of Your Business

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for the September Let's Write Cabin Pressure Challenge at letscreatecabinpressure.tumblr.com. It's my first ever Cabin Pressure fic, so please bear with me. (You know, because bears are BRILLIANT!).
> 
> This work is sadly un-betaed because of time-issues. Let me know if anything's off and I'll fix it immediately.
> 
> Enjoy

"Good morning, Carolyn. Did you enjoy your day off?" 

Martin came strolling into the portacabin, but was met with a "Hmpf," and the woman didn't even look up from her paper to great him.

"Okay," said Martin and went to pour himself a cup of coffee. He was in a very good mood and decided that pursuing a conversation with a cranky Carolyn would ruin it completely.

"What are you doing here this early anyway?" Carolyn wondered and held out her empty mug. Martin took the hint and refilled it.

"I'm always early," Martin answered.

"Why?" asked Carolyn.

"What do you mean, why?" asked Martin. "You don't want me to be late, do you?"

"No, but you know that Douglas is always late, so you don't get to do any proper work until he arrives anyway."

"Oh, there's always work to do," said Martin.

"It's good that I don't pay you by the hour," sighed Carolyn and looked at her paper again. "Now go and be somewhere else." She waved him away from her desk.

"You don't pay me at all," muttered Martin, and went to put the kettle back in its rightful place.  
"Where's Arthur today, by the way? You didn't come in alone, did you?"

"He's around here somewhere. I don't know where, and I don't care, as long as he's not in my face."

Martin smiled to himself. Arthur knew all too well not to bother his mother when she was in that kind of mood. He would surely turn up when Douglas arrived and the area was a bit "safer".

The captain wondered if Carolyn had heard anything about any possible customers, but decided not to asking and leave the task to Douglas, whenever he decided to show up. He sat down with his mug and looked out the window. He hoped Arthur would pop in soon. There was really no point in showing up early just to be stuck with Carolyn for hours with nothing to actually do. 

As if he had read his mind, a chirpy Arthur came through the door, humming an unrecognisable tune.

"Good morning, Skip," he beamed. "You're early today."

"Good morning, Arthur," Martin said and smiled back. "I'm always early."

"Yes, but today you're early-early," said Arthur and sat down next to him. "And we're on standby, so there's not really much to do yet. I mean, if we've had a customer we'd be out in G-ERTI by now, you and Douglas would be working on flight plans and doing walk-arounds pressing all kinds of buttons and switches, and I'd make sure that we had coffee, tea, juice, wine, beer, nuts, lots of nuts -"

"Yes, yes, yes," interrupted Carolyn. "We know what you do, Arthur. But we don't have a customer as of right now. Can you two go somewhere else if you insist on talking?"

"Sorry, Mum," Arthur said and lowered his voice. "And I thought maybe you'd sleep in today, considering -"

"Considering what?" Douglas had suddenly decided to honour them with his presence. 

"Nothing," said Arthur and jumped up from his seat. He stormed over to get himself a glass of water and stood awkwardly by the counter gulping down the liquid.

"What was that all about?" Douglas asked.

"I have no idea," stammered Martin and took a sip of his own cup to get an excuse not to talk.

"So Carolyn," Douglas turned to the CEO. "Any victims today?"

"Would I be sitting here if we did?" Carolyn hissed. "And you're late!"

"Late for what? Waiting?" 

"There's always work to do. You captain has informed me of that prior to your arrival."

"Oh, did he now?" Douglas looked at Martin. "What kind of work did the _captain_ suggest we'd fill this wonderful day with?"

"I haven't said anything," Martin started. "I simply said that there was always someth-"

"Oh, don't bother," the first officer interrupted and sat down at the same table. "So what did you do yesterday?"

"W-w-w-what? Who m-m-me?" Martin stuttered.

"Y-y-yes, _Sir_ , y-y-you." Douglas teased.

"Nothing special," Martin said and started flipping through a magazine that lay in front of him. "Just another day, you know. Sleeping in, reading. Had a tiny delivery job with my van."

"So I shouldn't hold my breath anticipating the book release about the great adventures of Captain Crieff then?"

"Oh that would be _brilliant_ , Skip." Arthur said enthusiastically and came over to sit next to Douglas. "You could write about all the adventures we go on."

"Arthur -"

"I mean, we go on adventures with G-ERTI all the time, don't we. A book would be BRILLIANT!"

"Oh goodie," said Douglas. "Let's all devote a whole chapter on how to serve your passengers juice without spilling."

"We definitely should. It's not as easy as it looks, Douglas." Arthur said with the most serious voice he could muster. "Sometimes G-ERTI gets a bit shaky and I have to try _really_ hard to get the drinks into the glasses."

"I don't think G-ERTI is the only one that's shaky. The Captain has also on numerous times shown signs of shakiness. Maybe we could write a chapter on that as well."

"Hey!" Martin objected.

"That's not a very nice thing to say, Douglas," said Arthur. 

"I didn't intend for it to be nice." 

"Oh, shut up all of you," yelled Carolyn. "Don't you have somewhere else to be?"

"Bad day, Carolyn?" Douglas sniggered. "Didn't Herc live up to your expectations last night?"

"What expectations?" Arthur wondered.

"It's a grown-up thing," said Douglas and chuckled.

"I am a grown-up," said Arthur. "I couldn't drive a car if I wasn't a grown-up, and you know I drive a car. It's red -"

"Yes, I am all too familiar with your car, as you already know, Arthur," Douglas said. "But spill the beans, Carolyn. What kind of adventures did you and the berk go on yesterday. The man could barely contain himself when he picked you up the day before yesterday. He must have had something big planned. But please, no _personal_ details."

"No details at all," said Carolyn. "It's none of your business."

"I know it's not my business," said Douglas. "But you will tell me anyway. I mean, what else is there to do?"

"You could always go and hoover G-ERTI," 

"But that's _my_ job!" Arthur said. "And I can't do the jobs that Douglas does. I can't do a walk-around, I wouldn't know what to look for and then I might miss something and then we would get in trouble and maybe we'd crash and then - "

"Relax, relax, Arthur. I was simply suggesting for Douglas to get out of my sight and earshot," sighed Carolyn. "Or maybe Captain Crieff can find something for you to do on the flight deck."

"Everything's taken care off already," said Martin. "You know I don't like to leave the plane without getting her ready for her next trip. There's nothing to do on G-ERTI if we don't actually have a trip to do."

"Of course there isn't," sighed Carolyn.

"So you might as well join us, Carolyn. Maybe we could make a little game out of it?"

"NO! Martin shouted. "Absolutely not!"

"Oh, a game?" Arthur was practically dancing in his chair. "What kind of game?"

"No, no, no, absolutely no!" said Martin. "I'm not playing a game about how interesting my day was."

"Why not? Afraid you're going to lose?"

"Will you two give it a rest," hissed Carolyn. "There will be no game, and I will certainly not tell you about my day. Go and be useful."

"What are you hiding, oh mighty alpha?" teased Douglas.

"I'm not hiding anything," said Carolyn annoyed. "Now have you boys gone deaf? Go and be useful!"

"But Mum, there's nothing to do," said Arthur. "There's really no point in going on G-ERTI to fill up the fridge with the food, because I haven't ordered any food, and if I did, then I would have to know how far we are going, because I don't know if I should get just lunch or maybe also dinner and you don't like it if I order too much food, because that costs money, and-"

"Arthur, light of my life. Do shut up."

"Right-o."

"Why are you so determined to talk about it, anyway? Did something special happen to you? You had a date, right?" Martin asked.

"Now that you mention it, I _did_ have a very interesting day." Douglas said and stretched a bit so his right hand was now clearly visible to everyone. It was wrapped in bandages.

"Oh, Douglas. What did you do? Does it hurt? Did you have to see a Doctor? Are there stitches? Can I see them? No, I don't want to see them. No, but I do." Arthur was truly conflicted.

"Oh, Martin, why did you have to ask?" Carolyn sighed. "Now we will never hear the end of it."

"Fine, I'll just give you the short version then," said Douglas. "I'm fine, Arthur. Don't worry. Let's just say it contained a cage, several bottles of lotion and a Barbie doll."

"Ewwwww, say no more!" Martin screwed up his face in disgust. "I'm really not in the mood for one of your _stories_."

"I am," said Arthur. "Why did you use so much lotion? And what happened to your hand?"

"FINE!" shouted Carolyn. "We went to Bath."

The three men turned towards the CEO in surprise.

" _You_ went to Bath?" Douglas stared at Carolyn. "But that's a _romantic_ place."

"What happened to 'don't want to talk about it'?" asked Martin.

"If that is what it takes to get Douglas to shut up about yet another one of his escapades, then I guess I will just have to," said Carolyn and sat down between her two pilots.

"Awww," whined Arthur. "But I wanted to hear about Douglas' hand."

"I, however, do _not_ ," stated Carolyn. "And judging by the look on Martin's face, I don't think he will either."

"I'm not sure I want to hear either of them," Martin muttered and rose from his chair to refill his coffee.

"I'll do that, Skip," said Arthur and jumped up and stole the mug out of his hands.

"Oh, okay," stammered Martin. "Thanks, Arthur."

Arthur quickly returned with a cup of coffee for the captain and Carolyn started talking.

"As you all know, Herc didn't want to tell me where he was taking me, even if he knows how much I loathe surprises."

"You can't loathe surprises, though" chuckled Arthur. "No one can do that. I understand that people don't like bad surprises. I mean, it wouldn't be brilliant if someone came in and yelled, 'Surprise! Your grandmother died', but good surprises are brilliant!"

"Have you finished?" Carolyn looked at her son, who immediately fell silent and sat down next to the first officer. "So, I've been spending the last few weeks trying to get him to reveal where we were going, but that stupid git wouldn't budge. He just kept promising me that I would like it. Which, we all know, couldn't be further from the truth. Why would I like anything that's kept from me?"

"Ignorance is bliss?" Douglas suggested. "What you don't know, won't hurt you?"

"We keep stuff from you all the time, Carolyn. You always say you're better off not knowing what we're up to," said Martin.

"But that's you two. I don't want to know as long as I don't get dragged into it. And at least I always know where you two are taking me, considering you don't get to go anywhere unless I tell you to go there."

"So what did you do in Bath," asked Douglas. "A romantic walk through the garden, perhaps a little stop on the Palladian bridge? Or couples massage at the spa?"

"Stop it, Douglas, I can feel my breakfast returning." 

"Did he get down on one knee at the bridge?"

"Oh God, Carolyn, you didn't turn him down, did you?" Martin almost choked on his coffee.

"Enough!" Carolyn shouted. "Are you going to let me tell the story or not?"

"By all means," Douglas beckoned. "Pray tell about your amazing adventure in _Bath_."

"We arrived at the hotel and the imbeciles thought it was appropriate to have decorated our room with rose petals. Like I'd want to sleep on a bunch of _leaves_."

"Oh, I love leaves," Arthur shot in. "There's nothing like jumping into a pile of leaves and just lay there staring up at the tree and the sky. And roses smell really good. I can imagine they're really comfortable to sleep on. And then throw all the leaves up in the air and maybe have a little leaf-war. Oh, did you and Herc throw petals at each other? Why are they called petals anyway? Did people use to step on them? Wouldn't that destroy them? I mean flowers are pretty delicate. No, wait, that's pedals. Nevermind."

"Arthur," Martin said. "Why don't you get Douglas a coffee too. And I think I saw a box of pineapple juice in the refrigerator."

"Oh brilliant! I love pineapple juice. Why can't all juices be pineapple? That would be brilliant!"

"Arthur."

"Oh, sorry, Skip. I'll be right back."

"Take your time, my boy," sighed Carolyn and continued when Arthur had finally managed to shut up. "So I removed the greenery while Herc was tipping the bell boy, and I had just chucked them in the bin when the idiot told me we had to leave our things and go out. 'We have an appointment' was all he said."

"And you followed without question?" Martin asked.

"God, you must be head over heels in love with this man," Douglas added.

"Without questions?" snorted Carolyn. "I had nothing _but_ questions. But the man refused to answer a single one of them and before I knew it, two people dressed in something that looked like pyjamas or sheets stood before us."

"Were they playing dress-up," came a chirpy voice behind Carolyn. Arthur had returned with the pineapple juice and Douglas' coffee. "I remember I wore a sheet once. I was pretending to be a ghost. Not a mean ghost, more like Casper. You know, a friendly ghost."

"I would have preferred ghosts," said Carolyn. "Apparently these two were supposed to help me relax and teach me to meditate. Like I would ever be able to relax in the presence of sheet-clad humans. I don't know what cult these people belonged to, but I didn't stay long enough to find out. I told Herc that if he wanted me to relax he should just have left me in the hotel room with a bottle of red."

"So you just left him there?" asked Martin.

"Left him? No, I left, he followed. He went on and on about how much it costed and how difficult it had been to get that appointment. Well he should have checked with me first, shouldn't he? He wouldn't have wasted his money on that voodoo nonsense."

"I hardly think it was voodoo, Carolyn. People meditate all the time. It's not really that uncommon. It's even supposed to be good for you." said Martin.

"Then let it be good for other people," Carolyn sneered. "That kind of nonsense is not my cup of tea. Nor am I into the rabbit food Herc tried to get me to eat for lunch. It was supposed to be _cleansing_. If I wanted my insides cleansed I would -"

"Yes, we get the picture, Carolyn," Martin interrupted. He really didn't want to hear details about Carolyn's inner cleansing process.

"But the place had nothing proper to eat, so after I watched him finish the green goo that was placed before him, I dragged him with me to the nearest steakhouse."

"And who said that romance was dead?" 

"So after lunch we went for a walk, and _yes_ Douglas, we ended up in the garden, but no, he didn't get down on one knee. I would have smacked him with a branch if he had. Anyway, I forced him to tell me what he had planned for the rest of the day. And this time he actually listened. I guess he didn't want to lose more money on stupid ideas that would never work."

"What did you do?" asked Arthur. "Did you see any lovely animals in the garden? Were there a lot of birds? Birds are brilliant."

"I really didn't pay attention to the animals, dear. I was too busy getting Herc to cancel all of the nonsense he had planned at the spa and we agreed that a dip in the jacuzzi was more than sufficient."

"I love jacuzzis," said Arthur and jumped in his seat. "It's a bathtub, only with bubbles. You really can't go wrong with bubbles."

"I actually agree with you on that one. That's why we ordered champagne as well."

"Oh, a bubbly drink in a tub with bubbles. That's like twice the fun!" Arthur said enthusiastically and the rest of the crew nodded in agreement.

"So we went to get our things and then down to the changing rooms. I got into the jacuzzi and had just taken a sip of my champagne when one of the staff members came over with a note. Apparently Herc had to leave immediately because of a work emergency, but that I could just stay and use the facilities. He had had a bottle of red sent up to my room and hoped I would be able to relax."

"Oh, Carolyn. I'm so sorry," Martin said apologetic.

"Well at least he listened to me in the end," said Carolyn. 

Awkward silence spread through the portacabin and no one really knew what to say. This wasn't the sort of story anyone would have expected from Carolyn Knapp-Shappey.

"Well, you wanted to know," Carolyn said and rose from her chair. "Now you know!"

"Oh, Mum," Arthur said with a sad face.

"It's nothing," said Carolyn with a emotionless face. "But I was certainly not staying in that awful place, so I packed my things and grabbed the bottle of wine and went home."

"Have you talked to Herc?" Martin wondered.

"He keep sending me texts, but I haven't been bothered to read them yet."

"I bet he's really sorry," said Arthur. 

"As he should be," said Douglas.

"Well, I don't care how sorry or not sorry he is," said Carolyn. "The next time, _I_ get to decide where we are going and what we are doing, and then Herc can expect a visit to a sheep farm in Wales as one of the activities."

Martin chuckled. He was too familiar with Herc's relationship with that particular animal, but he was glad that Carolyn was actually talking about a _next time_ despite what had happened.

"I didn't know you came home last night, Mum. I wish you would have told me, I could have kept you company. We could have played a game or watched a movie or had some ice cream. There's nothing like ice cream when you are sad," Arthur said. "I just thought you came home really, really early this morning."

Carolyn looked at her son. "It's fine, Arthur. I wasn't really in the mood for games or ice cream anyway."

"There's no such thing as not in the mood for ice cream!" Arthur stated.

"But where were you anyway?" Carolyn wondered. "You came home quite late last night. What were you doing?"

Arthur froze and started picking up the mugs and carrying them to the sink. "Nothing special."

"Arthur, you are a terrible liar and we all know it," said Carolyn.

"Yes, Arthur," said Douglas. "We're anxious to hear about your day. And your night ..."

"There's really nothing to tell," said Arthur nervously and started filling the sink with hot water. "I need to clean out these mugs now. What if someone calls and we have to leave? We can't leave dirty mugs in the sink."

Douglas walked over to the steward and turned off the running water. "Surely, that can wait. I want to hear about your day. It sounds exciting."

"Leave the poor bloke alone," said Martin. "If he doesn't want to talk about it, he doesn't want to talk about it."

"Thank you, Skip," said Arthur and smiled at the captain.

"No problem," said Martin and felt the smile warm his entire body. He smiled back, and then quickly looked down at the magazine hoping no one had noticed.

"Now, come on," said Douglas. "Just a tiny bit. Was your day, let's say – brilliant?"

"It was more than brilliant!" The words fell out of Arthur's mouth before he knew what he was saying. 

"Oh, _more_ than brilliant," chuckled Douglas. "It must have been heaven. I didn't think anything could move _beyond_ brilliant. Go on, Arthur. Give us a little. Your mother could do with some cheering up."

"Don't drag me into this, Douglas," said Carolyn. "But Arthur, dear. If it was more than brilliant, why won't you tell us about it?"

"Because I promised not to tell." Arthur clapped his hands to his mouth.

"Now this is starting to get really interesting." Douglas was smirking.

"Douglas, leave it," said Martin.

"No, I won't leave it," said Douglas. "We've all told a bit about our day, except from young Mr Shappey here, who has suddenly, and against all odds, gone quiet. I think he owes us at least a sneak peak to his _more than brilliant_ day. Tell me Arthur, was she pretty?"

"Who?"

"Your date," said Douglas. "Was she pretty."

Arthur's face instantly turned a shade of pink neither of them had seen before.

"Arthur, you had a date?" said Carolyn. "I didn't know you'd found a girl. Who is she? Do I know her? Don't tell me it's another one of those pony club girls."

"It isn't," said Arthur. "And stop talking to me."

"So you do admit you had a date," said Douglas.

"Listen to the man," interrupted Martin. "Stop bothering him."

"Thank you, Skip! More coffee anyone?"

However, Douglas was apparently not going to let this go. "Arthur, dear boy. The day before yesterday you had great plans regarding the traveling fair that was coming to Fitton. Did you at least get to go on the carousel?"

"Oh, I did! Three times! It was brilliant! Although I felt a bit sick after the second time, but how often do I get to go on a carousel, right? At least it was brilliant until, Sk –. Oh. Never mind."

"Until what?" Carolyn sounded worried. "Did someone get hurt?"

"I bet everyone was just fine!" said Martin. "Now can we talk about something else?"

Douglas looked suspiciously at Martin. "You're very protective about our steward today. You know something, don't you?"

Martin felt his face get warm and bet he was turning the same shade as Arthur had moments earlier.

"You know what happened, don't you? Damn it, I should have gotten here earlier."

"Yes, because there's not a better reason than _gossip_ to evoke proper work ethics," muttered Carolyn from her desk."

Suddenly the phone rang and the entire MJN crew waited with anticipation for Carolyn to answer it.

***

"So, _Sir_ , knows something about our dear steward, but won't tell," Douglas said as the two of them were left alone in the flight deck.

"Please balance the fuel, Douglas," Martin said and pretended to be extremely preoccupied with the numerous switches in front of him.

"I have a suggestion," Douglas continued. "For every question you answer, you get first pick of the menus."

"Not interested," said Martin. "Have you done the walk-around?"

"You know I have," said Douglas. "You're just avoiding my question."

"Maybe I am," said Martin. "But we have a plane to fly and I don't have time for your prying questions."

"Fine," said Douglas with a smirk. "We'll _always_ have time when we're in the air. I happen to know that Athens is quite a few hours away."

Martin sighed. This was going to be a long flight.

***

"So, this girl of Arthur's," Douglas said after the steward had popped his head into the flight deck and handed them their coffee and tea and disappeared just as quickly. "Have we met her?"

"Not talking about it, Douglas," said Martin and stared straight ahead while sipping his beverage.

"Why not, it's just Arthur."

"What do you mean, _just_ Arthur?" Martin replied a bit too quickly.

"Oh, seems like this is a touchy subject for _Sir_." Douglas smirked.

"No, no, no, not a touchy subject. I just ... er ... have you got the weather report for Athens?"

"Don't change the subject, Martin. You know everything there is to know about the weather in lovely Greece this evening."

"Oh. Right."

"Fine, you win."

"Really? Oh, I mean, win what?"

"We'll change the subject."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Good. I was getting tired of -"

"Let's hear about _your_ day."

"I already told you about my day."

"Not in detail," said Douglas. "Tell me about the book you were reading."

"Excuse me?"

"The book?" Douglas repeated. "You said earlier you were reading a book. Which book?"

"Er ... the ... the ... the …"

"Must have been a best seller, that one."

"The ... The ... Smuggler ... in the ... Rye?" Martin knew he was screwed.

"The Smuggler in the Rye? Any relations to a certain catcher by any chance?"

"Yes, in fact, it was his evil twin brother."

"His evil twin brother? Really?" Douglas looked at Martin who knew his face must have gone a disgusting shade of red by now. "Then tell me, _Captain_ , what is the Smuggler in the Rye about?"

"It's about a smuggler. Who smuggles ... things."

"Great book, was it?"

"Excellent."

"So when you finished reading this _excellent_ book. What did you do then?"

"I had some lunch."

"What did you have for you lunch?"

"A bowl of cereal."

"For lunch?"

"Yes, for lunch!" Martin was really not liking this. "Douglas, can you please stop. We don't need to talk about my day. I'm much more interested in hearing about how you hurt your hand."

"Oh, but before the captain carefully informed me, and let me quote your advanced vocabulary: 'Ewwwww, say no more!'"

"Well, I've changed my mind." Martin lied. "Let's hear it."

"Not until you tell me what you delivered with your van."

"Why do you want to know?"

"Because I care?"

"Very funny, Douglas."

"So, what were you delivering?"

"A ... cage."

"A cage?" 

"Yes."

"Big cage?"

"Medium."

"Medium cage?"

"Yes. Dog cage. Yes. That's it. A dog cage."

"Tell me, Martin. Did you enjoy the carousel?" 

"No, I fainted. OH DAMN!" 

"AHA!"

"How did you know?"

"Despite yours and Arthur's impeccable acting skills, I knew something was up. You two have been tip-toeing around each other all day, and Arthur's gone from helpful to your personal servant. Now tell me, why were you on a date with Arthur Shappey?"

"I wasn't," said Martin. "Or at least I don't think I was. Was I? Oh God. What is happening?"

"Start from the beginning. And do leave the smuggler out of this one."

"Well my plan actually was to stay at home and have a quiet and restful day. But after just a few hours, it got really boring. I mean, _really_ boring. There's nothing to do in my attic, and the book I tried to read was so uninteresting I even forgot what it was called. And I felt ... well ... lonely."

"Go on."

"Then I started thinking about all the things Arthur had talked about the day before, and I thought I'd just maybe, perhaps, possibly go outside for a little while and maybe take a walk in the park or something. It wouldn't hurt, would it? It would still be relaxing."

"Indeed."

"But I walked past the fair on my way to the park and Arthur had just finished his second go on the carousel and basically dragged me on board for the ride."

"And then you fainted."

"It took me about ten seconds before I passed out. There's a reason why I don't go on rides. My inner ear can't handle those kinds of motions. Next thing I knew I was waking up with my head in Arthur's lap."

"Naughty, captain Crieff."

"It was nothing naughty about it. He had splashed juice in my face."

Douglas laughed loudly. "Of course he had."

"Then he felt so guilty for forcing me to go on the ride and apologised like mad about not remembering my little problem, and about the juice, and that he couldn't find water, so he took the box he had in his jacket pocket, and a lot of other Arthurian things I can't recall right now. Then he hoisted me up and dragged me into a cafe to help me get cleaned up and buy me lunch as an apology."

"And you accepted."

"Of course I did," Martin said. "Why wouldn't I? You know my financial situation. I never turn down a free meal."

"A free meal? That was all it was?"

"No, also a meal with a friend. There's nothing wrong about that."

"I never said that it was."

"And when we finished, Arthur felt sorry for the left-over bread in the basket. He didn't want them to throw it away, so we went to the park to feed the ducks." Martin wanted to kick himself. Why the hell was he still talking?

"Oh, my," grinned Douglas. "We're seconds away from handholding here."

"No, that's it. Nothing more to tell. Now can we please move on to something else?"

"Fine," said Douglas. "Unless there's more you want to tell me."

"Why would I want to do that? That was the end," Martin said, avoiding the other man's eyes.

"Very well, then," said Douglas.

The two fell silent for a while before Douglas excused himself to go to the toilet. Martin was glad to be alone for a while. He would never hear the end of this. Why didn't he know when to shut up?

The first officer returned a few minutes later with a huge grin on his face. He sat down in his seat.

"What are you smirking about?"

"Nothing," said Douglas.

"There's always something when it comes to you," said Martin suspiciously. 

"Oh, I was just wondering if _Sir_ had seen any scary movies lately."

Martin gasped. "He told you?"

"He most certainly did," Douglas laughed.

"That clown came out of nowhere, I couldn't help it."

Douglas laughed even harder. "Of course it had to be clowns."

"It's not funny, Douglas!"

"I beg to differ, _Captain_."

"It's a common phobia, you know."

Douglas merely chuckled as a response.

"I have to go and talk to Arthur. You have control."

Douglas wolf-whistled as Martin left the flight deck to locate the steward. 

"Oh, shut up and fly the plane." Martin called as he walked through the door.

***

"Arthur?" Martin found the man in the galley where he was putting away the trays and rubbish from the three passenger's meals. "You told him?"

"I'm sorry, Skip. He tricked me."

"How much did you tell him?"

"Not much, just about the pizza and the DVD and how you made that really high noise when that clown fell out of that closet and how you buried your face in my chest. But I thought he thought I was talking about a girl. I never said it was you. How did he find out it was you?"

"He tricked me, as well," Martin sighed. "You didn't tell him anything else, right?"

"No, I swear," Arthur said reassuringly.

"Good. The less Douglas knows, the better."

"Why though?" asked Arthur. "I sort of understand why you first didn't want to tell Mum and Douglas, they'd get jealous that they didn't get to come along, and especially when Mum was sad about Herc, and Douglas had hurt his hand on that monkey cage."

"Monkey cage?"

"Yes," said Arthur. "I made him tell me." Arthur grinned proudly. "I said that if I had to tell him about my day then he had to tell me about his."

"Wow, you did? So what really happened?"

"He went to the zoo with a lady and she brought her little girl, and the girl put her doll into the monkey cage and Douglas had to get it out. But then he got stuck, and they had to use a lot of lotion to get him not stuck, and then the monkey bit his hand, and then the lady got really mad at him for not getting the doll out before the monkey took it."

Martin couldn't believe it. Not only had Douglas had the worst day possible, but it was _Arthur_ who had managed to get the information out of him. Martin had to admit he was impressed.

"I'm sorry Douglas had a bad day, though. And Mum. It makes me feel a bit guilty." Arthur said.

"Why? It wasn't your fault."

"No, but I feel sad for Mum and Douglas, and for making you pass out when my day was so happy. I mean, it was nice to be just you and me, without Mum and Douglas. I had a really good time."

"So did I," Martin admitted.

"And I'm sorry that I made you pass out and everything, and the next time I promise to get water instead of sticky juice, not that I want you to faint, but you know, in case you do. And we'll find a movie without any scary clowns in it, even if I kind of liked it when you used me as your hiding place. And I promise I'll stay awake and not fall asleep on your shoulder. Although it was a really good sleep."

"It was, wasn't it?" Martin smiled carefully. 

"It was _brilliant_!" Arthur beamed, warming Martin's inside and making him grin widely too. "So you don't mind if I fall asleep on your shoulder again? I promise I won't tell Douglas."

The intercom buzzed, calling Martin back to the real world and back to the nosy first officer in the flight deck. 

"It seems as if I have to go and land this thing," he sighed. "I'll see you later."

"Good luck, Skip," said Arthur. "Not that you need it, though. Because you're brilliant at landings. Especially when the weather is good. G-ERTI is hardly shaking at all."

Martin gave Arthur a tiny smile, and headed towards the flight deck.

***

They landed in Athens and found the dodgy hotel Carolyn had managed to book for them. Martin had ignored Douglas' prying questions when he had returned and kept the conversation strictly to aviation. He also avoided talking to both him and Arthur when they sat in the taxi on the way to the hotel. 

He could tell Arthur was confused by his lack of response and avoidance, and he felt horrible about it, but he couldn't bear any more of the first officer's teasing right now.

The three men got their keys to their rooms and bid each other good night, before they went into separate rooms.

Martin sat on his bed, flicking through the channels. He had had a while to think about the previous day and the conversations he'd had with the two other men on the plane. He had really enjoyed his day with Arthur. More than enjoyed it, to be honest. The man had always had a tendency to make him feel good and happy like no one else ever could. He really appreciated that about Arthur. But that was not even remotely near to what he felt when Arthur hadn't let go of his hand after the scary clown scene, or what he had felt when Arthur's head had fallen heavily on his shoulder. Martin was smiling. 

He kept surfing channels and kept thinking, and finally decided what to do. He knew he would get teased into all eternity by Douglas and heaven knows how Carolyn would react, but maybe it would all be worth it in the end? He picked up his mobile and sent a text. 

_Room 203. Stephen King's IT is on the telly._

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own anything you can recognise in this story. I just want to thank the genius that is John Finnemore and the BBC for creating these brilliant people so that I can play with them.


End file.
